Worst Case Scenario

Heya ,

             Life has so many twists and turns . Am in a very confused state .  This place is turning out to be a lonely one . Pblm is i dunnno weather i am enjoying this or not . I dont know weather i like this loneliness or not . Some time is feel like running away . But some time when am distressed i find peace with my comp . It has never put me down from 2nd yr . Not even once . Wat ever be the pblm only two things can brighten me up one is jesus another is my pc . Today i was asked to receive HR team of WIPRO technologies . They were cool the same guy came and told tat i will have to join them by firt week of july.Was not in a good mood was thinkin of all my school day friends . Gotta go early there to receive the techic team . Could not sleep . My EasyShare project came to a stunning stop . Was unable to handle too many sockets . So stopped thinking about tat  . I was going throught the jdk1.6 doc .Got a new idea to tru for the next week . Trying to keep myself occupied so tat i dont get depressed . I have realised the most terrible poverty is loneliness, and the feeling of being unloved. One thing is for sure all my life jesus and my programming will exist . I guess i can live with both of em . Dunno y i have this craze on this prog . I have not done any thing tat is working as i expected . But i just cant stop trying . Will surely complete before i leave this coll . So next week gonna rewrite the code using a different  protocol . I want to write a program to first do any file system operation in the system . Then will give an option to share any file . Will update the db . Have to show the client all the shared files . Then he shld selec t the file he wants and tat will be downloaded . I have programs to achive the following

 1)Filesystem operations

2)Server Program for downloading and uploading

3) Sharing and updating a folder

Biggrest pblm is am very poor in creatin UI . Swing looks like a completly new Tech . so takin some time . God i wish i had some one who could finish this UI properly for me  . dont wanna waste time creatinthis UI . Need some time sit and code . Side by side am doing a book on sun certification . Finishing two chaps daily . Tats the only usefull thin i am doing in coll . Cant sit and listen to all lectures . Its better i do some thing than dream . All i want for now is a room full of all the kinda snacks i love my pc and the cretification book. My poor friend ebby is fully worked out , I am not satisfied with my productivity . Have not done any thing tat impressed me . My Easyshare is gonna be a peer to peer according to my new design . Any body outta there plz help me solve this pblm . I need to request the server for some files . Is there a way to do tat . Dunno how to implement in this . Mostly will have to leave out certain modules . Am pretty confident of all other modules . Waiting for the day when i will finish this software and publish the source . Have to face AKBK and manage with him .Have a Tough time ahed . And WI won against pak tat sounded nice .

                        All the years wasted in searchin

                      for finding the things tat never existed

                      Made me do crazy things , those i regret now

                      Realised that the only truth is that i

                      was a fool all these years seeing things

                      never existed . Wondering what more

                     i have to learn about this world . Wondering

                    if i had ever come across truth in my life

                       I hope tat this loneliness will spur something

                        in me to find something great to die for .

                       Worldly love and friends give an illusion

                    that we are not alone  . But the unreplaceble

                   love he shares and the truth we find in him

                            is what makes me to live .

                                            

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~ by dineshabe on March 16, 2007.

4 Responses to “Worst Case Scenario”

  1. love the poem…

  2. thnx .

  3. The only medicine for loneliness and depression is “The Love of God”. Hide urself in his “Garden of Love” where there is no depression and loneliness……….

  4. i did tell tat in last 2 lines !!!

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